I don't really know what to say. I miss blogging, but I kind of needed to step back and just reflect on life. I definitely needed to be silent for awhile. I'm not even sure I'm really going to begin blogging again with any regularity right now, I still feel like I'm in a silent season, but I wanted to at least catch up a little. Especially since seeing as how I really started blogging just to have a journal of sorts. I've got a lot on my mind today, and some free time, so I'm feeling the desire to just get some of my thoughts in order.
I think having my posts show up on facebook kind of shocked me into silence. There's something about realizing that suddenly a lot of people you actually know are reading what you think about things. That, and having a baby that has been teaching me that I really can't control everyone and everything and the best methods aren't always foolproof. Apparently I hadn't learned that yet.
I survived my sister being gone on a YWAM DTS for five months. I guess for some people they frequently go that long without seeing or talking to their sisters, but my sisters are really my closest friends. I missed her a lot. Thank you, God, for facebook chat. It made it much easier. But I am so glad she's home.
A little update on the kids and life and what they're like right now~
I think sixth grade is the new seventh (or the old seventh?) Or maybe I just don't remember (I am almost thirty, you know :) But school is different, again, this year. I guess every year will always be different. But now I have a jr-higher, whatever that means. I am so thankful we homeschool. I just don't think I could handle having Anna in school and all the outside influence that would bring. There is enough of it already. She is an incredible, awesome, (as-of one month ago real) woman ;) but it's hard on a girl being different. She wants to be normal, to fit in, to be like her friends; and some of that is fine. It's been a season of praying hard, listening to and seeking God's perspective on things, and learning how to shepherd her while granting increasing freedom, choices, and privilege; but also protecting her. What a fine line. I don't know how people navigate this without the Holy Spirit. She is highly sensitive and emotional, but I'm also enjoying her more and more. She is so good with the little kids, at seeing what needs to be done and helping out just because she wants to bless me. She is so responsible and so good at managing her time. She pretty much schools herself now (except History and Bible which we do together) with the occasional question or concept she needs help with. I couldn't have asked for a more incredible daughter. It's hard and intense, but also very cool watching Anna grow into who God is making her to be.
Caleb is 9. Such a quiet, sensitive, thoughtful guy. A real pleasure and blessing to Glen and me. He's grown and matured so much this year. He and Glen are taking a gun safety course this week as we allowed him to buy a shotgun earlier this year. He's a hard worker, and still is showing a strong bent toward building and engineering things. He also has a great love of the outdoors and all things hunting related.
Ethan just turned 8. My New Year's Eve baby :) He's so different than Caleb that everything with him still feels like a first. His brain is pretty much all Star Wars, all the time. He always has some battle playing in his head. He's super sweet, and so smart. Still very affectionate. He calls me "Mom Mom" and Glen "Dad Dad." I'm not sure when or why he started doing this, he was quite young, but he still does it. I kind of thought he would outgrow it, but not yet. And now Moriah has started doing it too. Mostly when they're asking a question or trying to get our attention. If I could just get him to stop pretending the broom is a lightsaber we'd be good ;)
Moriah. Talk about 6 going on 30. She's such a little mother. She loves to play outside, loves to play all kinds of creative, imaginative games with Noah and Haven. She can invent games and ideas that entertain them for hours. They play house, store, restaurant, pet shop, puppies, and all kind of other stuff. She loves dogs, which is kind of ironic because when she was a toddler she would scream hysterically at the sight of any dog, but now she loves them. She has a very late birthday, so she's really kind of a Kdg/1st grade mix, but her school is coming along really well. She's reading better and better, and seems to have a math mind. When you tease her she kind of points her chin down and looks up at you with her eyes and says, "Mo-om!" or "Da-ad." And Glen teases me endlessly because it is the exact same look that I give him when he teases me. It really is funny to see her do it because I can tell it's the exact same face that I make.
Noah. Oh........Noah. My Mr. Charming. AKA Mr. Know It All. I guess that's to be expected with you're number 5 and feel the need to make your place in a large family. His personality doesn't lend itself well to being treated like a baby or being talked down to, so he's very dynamic; and yes, seems to currently think he knows everything. He was so proud to receive his "official job list" soon after he turned four. Notice I say was. The novelty has kind of worn off. But he is a pro at cleaning up the living room, bringing down the laundry, making his bed, straightening the shoe closet, and feeding the dog. When he's in the mood. Ahem.
(Have I mentioned we got a dog. It was back in like, May, or something. Moriah had been begging for a dog. We are not dog people. We have an outdoor cat that we joke is the perfect cat and that God just sent her to us. She appeared a few years ago, catches all kind of unwelcome creatures around the house, and lets the kids play with her and pull her tail and all kinds of things like that. Her name is Gracie. So we always said we'd get a dog if God sent us the perfect dog like He'd sent us the perfect cat. So I was in the nursery at church one night and was telling my friend this exact story. Right after church, a friend of ours came up and said she had a little dog that needed a home and was wondering if we would like him. Hmmm....interesting. I got the details. Sounded good. Been an outside dog for awhile, sweet, good with kids, not aggressive, didn't chase my friend's chickens. Used to being in the country. Okay. Picked up the dog. Perfect dog. His name is Biscuit. He tolerates Moriah dressing him and putting a leash on him anddragging him around
playing with him. So anyway.)
Haven. He's two. That's about sums it up. I think I need to go re-read my Taming of the Two Post. He is all sweetness and smiles and snuggles and stutters wrapped up into a whirlwind tornado two year old boy. So sweet. And so busy. I'm often left wondering how in the world I ever managed with just toddlers. It seems that it takes all of our eyes to keep an eye on Noah and Haven. They have these blue and brown striped footed pajamas that have a monkey on them.that they like to wear together. I was joking the other night before Glen and the two older boys left for cub scouts that.Thing One and Thing Two were putting on their uniforms to terrorize me while he was gone. I was only partly joking. :)
(the picture of innocence)
And Grace. Sweet Grace. Oh how she has stretched and humbled me :) That will be probably an entire post in itself. In two days she will be nine months old. Nine months. Where has the time gone? She is, for the most part, a smiley, happy sweetie. She loves her bouncer and can play there for awhile as long as she has company nearby. (Which, of course really means she is number seven and used to being with people all the time and doesn't like so much not being entertained. Ha ha.) She has started really eating baby food and some normal food within the last month, and just this week has learned to sit up on her own a little. I know, it seems late to a lot of people, but our babies have always been like that. So far they're all good and all smart, so I'm not worried. All our kids have been around 8 months to sit up, 10ish to crawl, and close to 16 to walk. Lucky me :) Seriously. All you moms with lots of kids know exactly what I'm talking about. Now if we could just come to an agreement on the whole sleeping thing...
(those are really her eyes, aren't they gorgeous?)
Life in general is different. This season has been one of intense change and transition. Internally and externally. I don't really like change, so it's taken me awhile to adjust and settle in to new things. And it's good, for the most part. Some of it I still don't prefer, but some of it is good. It just takes me awhile. That also probably has a good bit to do with me just being quiet lately. It almost feels like a new life. I've always said things are really easier in many ways with a lot of kids, and that is partly true, but learning to juggle older kids and younger kids is definitely a new challenge. Glen and I are definite homebodies. We prefer to just be home and hanging around. We intentionally chose to not overcomplicate our life with outside activities, too many commitments, etc. Suddenly we have these kids who are older and want to do things like play with their friends! *sigh* So we went from our life of school one day a week, and church on Saturday nights to early Sunday service, Wedenesday night church, gymnastics, and cub scouts. And we're in the process of praying about if Anna should do a two day per week homeschool tutorial next year. Not to mention that the time of possibly having another baby is rapidly approaching. We're still very good to guard our family time, I really do believe that is super important, so the other five nights a week we stay home together, but it still feels so much busier than it used to.
Life. x7. Whew.